Name Discrimination
by Jeff Davis
The minority civil rights industry has been eclipsed by Bush’s war in Iraq for the last three and a half years. Eager to get the spotlight back on black “suffering” Jesse Jackson and his fellow travelers have now discovered a new form of “evil” wrought by the “wicked” white man: Name Discrimination!!! (Gasp! Shock! Horror!)
Before diving into this topic, let’s step back for a moment and think about Affirmative Action and quotas. Let’s say you have two businesses competing with each other. Business “A” hires only the best white people while business “B” hires the best people regardless of race. If the races are equal, then business “B” should be a raging success thanks to its color-blind policies and there should be no need for the Feds to step in and shove integration down people’s throats –so why did they?
The truth is that our politicians, the mass media and even some of the minority hustlers KNOW that the blacks are not equal. They KNOW that most discrimination resulted from EXPERIENCE with blacks, not ignorance of them. White business owners don’t want unreliable black workers who only show up when they feel like it or black “professional” workers who finished in the bottom tenth of their college class or black workers who steal from the company or black male workers who relentlessly harass the attractive white women workers. Segregation produced productive successful all-white companies which were very embarrassing for the blacks and liberals. By forcing Affirmative Action on all American companies, it becomes less obvious that Ford and General Motors are heading toward bankruptcy because of black and Latino workers –although mostly white car companies in Sweden and Germany appear to be doing just fine.
According to ABC News, “Studies of resumes have found that people with black-sounding names are less likely to get callbacks. [The news program] 20/20 put twenty-two pairs of names to the test, posting identical resumes except for the names at the top. The resumes with the white-sounding names were actually downloaded 17 percent more often by job recruiters than the resumes with black-sounding names.” So employers don’t want lazy affirmative action blacks working for them, eh? Surprise, surprise!
ABC News goes on to say, “What are some of those names? Here’s a list from the book “Freakonomics,” by Steven D. Levitt and Stephen J. Dubner showing the top 20 whitest- and blackest-sounding girl and boy names.”
The twenty allegedly whitest girl’s names are “Molly, Amy, Claire, Emily, Katie, Madeline, Katelyn, Emma, Abigail, Carly, Jenna, Heathe, Katherine, Caitlin, Kaitlin, Holly, Allison, Kaitlyn, Hannah, Kathryn. Supposedly, the twenty blackest girl’s names are Imani, Ebony, Shanice, Aaliyah, Precious, Nia, Deja, Diamond, Asia, Aliyah, Jada, Tierra, Tiara, Kiara,Jazmine, Jasmin, Jazmin, Jasmine, Alexus, Raven.”
The twenty whitest boys’ names are “Jake, Connor, Tanner, Wyatt, Cody, Dustin, Luke, Jack, Scott, Logan, Cole, Lucas, Bradley, Jacob, Garrett, Dylan, Maxwell, Hunter, Brett, Colin. The twenty blackest boys’ names are DeShawn, DeAndre, Marquis, Darnell, Terrell, Malik, Trevon, Tyrone, Willie, Dominique, [I could have sworn Dominique was a girl's name, but who knows what goes on in the black mind?] Demetrius, Reginald, Jamal, Maurice, Jalen, Darius, Xavier, Terrance, Andre, Darryl.” The two Jews who wrote this book did not explain just how they arrived at the conclusion that all these names were the “whitest” and “blackest” in their categories.
Obviously, the next step to remove this “sinful racist blight” on American society has to be Affirmative Action quotas for downloaded resumes. Potential employers must not be allowed to download more than, say, two “white-sounding” names unless they download one black-sounding name as well, and no more than three allegedly Caucasian-named resumes without at least one person with a name ending in “nez” or “nos,” you get the idea. Designing the software for such a diverse and multicultural requirement should be easy to design and install on Monster.com and other employment websites, and obviously this is something which the full power of the Federal government must be brought to bear on. I mean, it’s not as if America has any more pressing concerns at the moment other than making sure DeShawn Washington and Imani Jefferson get their resumes downloaded. Right?