Einstein’s Theory of Moral Relativity
Proposed by James Buchanan
Sooner or later, Einstein’s reputation in physics will be ruined by his plagiarism. Professor Umberto Bartocci has written a book arguing the case that Einstein plagiarized E=mc^2 from Olinto De Pretto, who published two years earlier. Einstein’s 1905 paper which led to a Nobel Prize had ZERO references. One website discusses other likely plagiarism in that paper. Professor Friedwardt Winterberg, who studied physics at the Max Planck Institute, also accuses Einstein of stealing other people’s work as noted here.
Einstein may lose his Nobel Prize due to further thievery surrounding the photoelectric effect. If that happens, maybe we can still get him a Nobel Prize in literature or something. For that reason based largely on information that can be found here, I propose:
Einstein’s Theory of Moral Relativity
1).Find a homely, but brilliant Serbian girl to help you through the university and to write your first papers.
2).When people ask you how you found the time to write a brilliant paper while working a full time job as a third class patent clerk and raising a family, tell them all the brilliant ideas came to you in your dreams.
3).Befriend a really brilliant physicist (like David Hilbert) and try to trick him into sending you the key equations you need to finish your next paper. Then rush to finish and publish your paper with the correct equations to claim them as your own. Then belittle the friend who sent you those key equations.
4).When looking for a really neat snappy equation to plagiarize (like E=mc^2) check the Italian physics journals or your friends (the family of Einstein’s close friend, Michele Besso, were friends with the De Pretto family), a Swiss professor will probably never catch this sort of plagiarism.
5).Once you’ve gotten your homely, but brilliant wife to write two ground-breaking papers for you and you decide to divorce her, you may have to promise her all the money from the Nobel prize to keep her mouth shut about who did most of the work and how much plagiarism and theft went into the papers.Warning: Once you divorce the homely, but brilliant wife, you may never produce another significant work.
6).After divorcing your homely, but brilliant wife, marry your cousin. Then start cheating on her with the niece of a friend.
7).Make sure the victim of your most obvious plagiarism (De Pretto E=mc^2) passes away (in 1921), before you get your Nobel prize (16 years after the 1905 paper).
8).Desert your children and move to America to get a cushy job at Princeton, where you continue to philander while failing to produce anything of significance.